Meet the Muses
by iccess-america
Summary: Ever wonder who the genius r/r your wrestling fics a.k.a. Iccess-america? An intro to me and my wwe muses the first of the muse series.....Rated PG-13 for little bit of language and psychotic behaviour? *Completed!*
1. A Hurricane Hit the Pizza Boy

Meet the Muses  
  
Part I: The Hurricane and the Pizza Boy  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything associated w/ the WWE so don't sue me. The only person I own is me and half the time I'm not even sure that's true. Layna 'That's right because I own you. Mwahahahahaha' Oh, and I also own the characters of Adrian, Layna, and the Pizza Boy.  
  
Robyn sits at her computer and has just finished reading Casey and T-Boy's fic 'Edge Becomes a Muse'. [Read their stuff. It's much funnier than mine will EVER be.. Unless their willing to help]  
  
Robyn: I've wanted to write a WWE story yet none of my muses have given me any ideas. What good is it to have a muse if they aren't any help to me in the first place!  
  
Robyn reaches for her jar full of lollypops and pulls out a strawberry lollypop unwrapping it.  
  
Robyn: I know, [giant light bulb flashes over her head] I'll just call for my muses. Muses! Hello? Muses? Get down here or I shall write you into the World of Unspeakable Horror a.k.a. the unknown MWAHAHAHAHAHA.  
  
[The doorbell rings and Robyn goes to answer it]  
  
Robyn: That should be my muses. or the pizza delivery guy, I'm starving!  
  
[A nerdy kid with bad acne is standing at the door]  
  
Pizza Boy: 2 large pepperoni pizzas with extra cheese?  
  
Robyn: That's me. How much do I owe you?  
  
PB: That will be eighteen fif- aahhh!  
  
[Mickey catches the pizza before it hits the ground]  
  
Robyn: Uh..  
  
PB: [Lying on the ground] I'm okay.  
  
Suddenly Hurricane pops into the doorway.  
  
Robyn: What the.? Hurricane! What are you doing here? I'm not in any trouble and you just maimed the poor acne ridden pizza boy.  
  
Hurricane: Sorry citizen Robyn but your puppy was in the pool and it looked like it was drowning. [Hands Robyn Max]  
  
Robyn: F.Y.I. Hurricane, dogs can swim.  
  
Hurricane: Oh  
  
Mickey: Now please go into the kitchen and make me some blueberry tea.  
  
Hurricane: Why  
  
Robyn: I'm the author and I control you and have the power to send you to.. the World of Unspeakable Horror MWHAHAHAHA! [Lightning strikes]  
  
Hurricane: You're scary when you do that.  
  
Robyn: That's because I'm all powerful.  
  
Adrian [pops in] or she thinks she is.  
  
Robyn: Adrian, get the fuck out of my story!  
  
Adrian: [disappears]  
  
Hurricane..  
  
Robyn: Don't ask. So, why are you here again?  
  
Hurricane: uh. Oh yeah. I would think you'd recognize one of your own muses.  
  
Robyn: No way! I put you down as a muse? When?  
  
Hurricane: Look through your notebook, your list should be there.  
  
Robyn: Which notebook?  
  
View changes to a stack of notebooks sitting on her desk.  
  
Robyn: This is going to take a while. Sit down and have some pizza.  
  
Quicker than Flash Gordon, the Hurricane makes Robyn's blueberry tea and helps himself to a slice of pizza and the Super Friends marathon.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Part II: You Call Him a Muse?! 


	2. Goatman, Skittles, and out of my head!

Part II: You call HIM a muse?!  
  
AN: For those of you who read my story (Luke, Casey, & T-Boy) the first part wasn't the end. I was debating with myself about how I wanted the format of the story to be and I've decided to finish it in 1 swoop (though it will be separated into parts.) By the way, the stuff in italics for my stories is going to be characters thoughts and flashbacks but flashbacks aren't in my humor fics. So who's my very disappointing 'muse' if you can call him one?  
  
5 notebooks, 15 cups of blueberry tea, 4 hours of Super Friends, and 3 slices of pizza later.........  
  
Robyn: I found it! [Does a little victory dance] And just in time too.  
  
Low and behold who would it be but, BILLY GUN!  
  
Robyn: *blink* what was I THINKING when I put you as a muse?! I must have had too  
  
much coffee that day. [Tosses half drunken vanilla latte] No offense Billy, but once  
  
upon a time, I used to admire you. But you've had more reinventions than Madonna.  
  
You went from Billy Gunn with the cowboy hats and junk, to Rock-a-Billy, (not many  
  
remember that little 'phase' but I do and I can't say that I haven't been scared for life.)  
  
Then there was DX and then you went solo which was all fine and well. But then you  
  
teamed with CHUCK PALOMBO! (Sorry if I didn't spell his name right but you can  
  
probably understand my distaste) I won't even say how bad THAT was.  
  
Billy: What? Every wrestler goes through the reinvention thing all the time. It's away to  
  
stay popular.  
  
Robyn: That's true but the whole Billy and Chuck thing has made you fade into complete  
  
obscurity and figuratively noted you as old news.  
  
Billy: You mean you don't like me anymore? I came all the way here to be rejected!  
  
First the WWE, then you! [On the verge of a nervous breakdown]  
  
Robyn: Chill Bill.  
  
Billy: Don't call me Bill.  
  
Robyn: Okay. I know what I can do with you. You can stay in Tower A with Adrian  
  
until I can write a story about your never ending need to reinvent yourself.  
  
Billy: Okay. I'm going to get a slice of pizza and put in a movie.  
  
Robyn: Suit yourselves, considering my whole DVD collection has nothing but chick  
  
flicks.  
  
Hurricane: Anything that's NOT a chick flick?  
  
Robyn: Check Layna's collection. She won't mind.  
  
Just then the doorbell rings. Standing there is what looks like a human rainbow.  
  
Robyn: [Gleeful tone] Jeff Hardy! [Drools]  
  
Layna: [Pops in] Watch the drool and your turning into a *cough* FANGIRL *cough*  
  
Robyn: Uh......  
  
Layna: Welcome.  
  
Robyn: Hi Jeff.  
  
Jeff: That's me. Hey do you have any skittles?  
  
Robyn: Sure  
  
Robyn goes to her computer where she has a giant bag of Skittles.  
  
Jeff: [Attacks the bag of Skittles and puts a big handful into his mouth.] (He makes a  
  
face)  
  
Robyn: *snickers* Sour Skittles.  
  
Part III: Goat with a World Domination Complex.  
  
Doorbell Rings as Robyn fights Jeff for the bag of sour skittles.  
  
Robyn: [Opens the door while chewing sour skittles]  
  
And who's at the door this time?  
  
Robyn: Look everybody! A goat wearing rather loud pants has come to join the party!  
  
Jericho: Do you know who I AM!?  
  
Robyn: [Squinting] Should I? [Takes another handful of Skittles]  
  
Jericho: I'm the freaking King of the World!  
  
Billy: And the goat has a World Domination Complex.  
  
Adrian: Well that's funny because she think she's all powerful!  
  
Robyn: Adrian, get OUT of my story. I promise you'll have plenty of lines and won't be  
  
thrown into the Jell-O pit.  
  
Adrian: How did you get into my HEAD!?  
  
Robyn: That's why I'm all powerful, remember? Plus, that's apart of the special powers  
  
I posses because I'm the writer. So, will you get out?  
  
Adrian: Throw in some vanilla pudding and you have yourself a deal.  
  
Robyn: Lines in the next story, no Jell-O, and vanilla pudding. Deal  
  
Jericho: What was THAT about?  
  
Robyn/Adrian: Nothing. Who are you again?  
  
Jericho: The ayatollah-of-rockin-rolla. And yes Roslyn/Countess, ayatollah is a real  
  
word; as in a title of respect.  
  
Layna: [Pops in yet again] then why do you have it?  
  
Robyn: First of all, its Robyn or Iccess the superior when I'm in a bad mood. And  
  
second, STAY OUT OF MY HEAD! Third, you weren't invited and definitely not a  
  
muse! [Slams door in Jericho's face.]  
  
Jericho: Open up you ASSCLOWNS  
  
All: NO! Jericho: What do you mean I'm not a muse? You're a bona fide Jerichoholic. You even have me on your list.  
  
Robyn: [looks at the list] Crap! He's not going to be for long. [Grabs eraser]  
  
Robyn spends 20 minutes trying to erase Jericho's name from the list.  
  
Robyn: Stupid ink! [Defeated] I give up. Someone let Jericho in.  
  
Jericho: I knew it, she loves me!  
  
All: [Roll their eyes]  
  
Robyn: [Sarcastically] Yes Chris, I want you, take me away.  
  
Jericho has a satisfied look on his face.  
  
Robyn: But seriously Jericho. If you insist upon being one of my muses you HAVE to  
  
do something about your wardrobe.  
  
Jericho: What's wrong with my wardrobe?  
  
Robyn: Your outfits could light up Vegas and you scare small children.  
  
Jeff: Forget small children. Try the general population.  
  
Jericho: Shut up, Hardy Boy.  
  
Jeff: Hey you can't blame me for being honest.  
  
Robyn: As I was saying, you must wear pants void of sound & unheard of colors... and  
  
find a shirt that highlights your awesomely defined muscles.  
  
There's a long silence and Jericho has a satisfied look on his face.  
  
Robyn: What? [Notices stares from everyone in the room including Hurricane who was  
  
still watching The Super Friends] Why is everyone staring at me like that?  
  
Layna: Robbie, listen. Stop, rewind, and push play. [Pushes play on a mini tape  
  
recorder] Recorder: 'Find a shirt that highlights your awesomely defined muscles'  
  
Layna: You're welcome.  
  
Robyn: [Runs screaming into her bedroom]  
  
Hurricane: Alright then. Wanna order more pizza?  
  
Jeff/Billy: Okay.  
  
Jericho: No thanks I gotta keep in shape for my favorite Jericoholic.  
  
Everyone else: *cringe*  
  
AN/// Well that's the end of Chapter 2 which is much longer then chapter 1. I hope ya'll liked it. If so, r/r and if not still do it. There is one more left to go but I can't type it right now (homework). It's done I promise. Anyways later! My next fic isn't that funny. It's going to be called 'The House Party Gone Wrong.' Tune in by next week for the concluding chapter which is going to be pretty short. ICCESS TBC 


	3. Shawn Michaels and a Concussion

Meet the Muses  
  
Author: Iccess America  
  
Chapter 3: Shawn Michaels and a Concussion  
The sound of Robyn smashing her head against the wall can be heard & the WWE  
  
muses are still sitting in the room watching T.V.  
  
Jeff: How long do you think she can go before she knocks herself out?  
  
Hurricane: I don't know. She's been going at it for the past 2 hours. Do you think we  
  
should stop her?  
  
Billy: Yeah, for all we know she could be waiting for us thinking about horrible things  
  
she can do to us.  
A crash is heard and the sound stops. Then a girl looking like Robyn but with blue  
  
streaks in her hair comes out of the room.  
  
Jericho: What'd you do to your hair?  
  
Layna: What'd you mean what'd I do to my hair?  
  
Jericho: You dyed it blue.  
  
Layna: No, really captain obvious? Someone give him a medal.  
  
Adrian comes out of nowhere and puts a medal around Jericho's neck. Then, he takes out  
his camera with the absurdly large flash bulb and snaps a shot of Jericho.  
  
Jericho: My eyes! [Five minutes later.] Okay, I'm better.  
  
Jeff: She's not Robyn. [To Layna] Who are you?  
  
Layna: I'm Layna, Robyn's second personality.  
  
All: Hi Layna!  
  
Adrian: She has a personality?  
  
Layna: Go to the unknown Adrian.  
  
Adrian: OKAY!  
  
All:  
  
Layna: What? Oh a party with three of my favorite things: Billy Gun, skittles, and....  
  
Jericho: Chris Jericho?  
  
Layna: No, superheroes. I don't like you.  
  
Jeff/Hurricane/Billy: I like her already!  
  
Jeff: Wait. Where's Robyn.  
  
Layna: Oh....um, she passed out from hitting her head against the wall.  
  
[Doorbell rings]  
  
Layna: I should get that. [Runs over to get the door] Who might it be? Another muse  
  
perhaps?  
  
Layna: Oh she is going to LOVE this!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Unless you're denser than cement and haven't got enough brain for a jellyfish (jellyfish  
  
don't have brains) then you've probably figured this out already..... (See chap. Title)  
  
Shawn: Are you the one who brought me here?  
  
Layna: Um.......not really. The person who bought you here is a little........indisposed at  
  
the moment. Come in. Hey guys, any luck in reviving Iccess?  
  
Jeff: None. I tried skittles.  
  
Hurricane: I tried smelling salts.  
  
Billy: I tried to cold water.  
  
Jericho: I even tried my awesomely defined muscles [flex] Maybe I should try CPR or  
  
mouth to mouth.  
  
[Silence]  
  
Layna: [Light bulb] [Walks into other room] Hey Robyn, wake up. You maybe suffering  
  
a concussion but that is NO reason to ignore Shawn Michaels who is in your living room.  
  
[Robyn jumps up] (I'm in Spanish class so I'm writing in Espanol)  
  
Robyn: Shawn Michaels esta en mi sala? (Shawn Michaels is in my living room)  
  
Layna: Si el esta aqui. (Yes, he is here.)  
[Okay screw that!]  
Jeff pops into the doorway.  
  
Jeff: Robyn, you're awake. [To Layna] What did you do to her?  
  
Layna: [shrugs] I told her Shawn was here, she woke up.  
  
Jeff: [secretly jealous tone to Layna] What? She got a thing for the guy?  
  
Robyn: [Ignoring Jeff] Move it Hardy, I got another muse to attend to.  
  
Jeff: [Blocking the doorway] I don't think you should. You got a bad bump on your head and I think you should lie down.  
  
Robyn: [Glare]  
Jeff: [still blocking the door.]  
Robyn: Move!  
  
Jeff: [To Layna] is she always this cranky when she's nearly beat herself senseless?  
  
Layna: [shrugs]  
  
Shawn: [from living room] uh, guys, I think she fainted........ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
You know what I have a project to do so if I'm not too busy tomorrow night I'll type the  
  
rest of this chapter and the beginning of 'House Party.....' Later days and thanks again  
  
Luke for the review  
  
XOXOXOXOXOXO *MWAH*  
  
Iccess 


	4. Ambulance the hospital and epilogue

AN:// Hey, I hope ya'll were pleased with my last update...... and Luke you won't be in this one cause like I said its already finished and so is the next one. I write faster then I update to tell you the truth so you are going to be in the third installment of the muse series, 'Boardroom' or if I come up with something else you'll be in that too. Sonar, you'll also have a role in the next one, sorry for the incredibly short lines.  
  
Meet the Muses  
  
Iccess-america  
  
Chapter 4: Ambulance, the hospital, and epilogue, a.k.a. A sad excuse for an ending  
  
[Jeff and Layna run into the living room.]  
  
Shawn: She was fine just a minute ago telling me how much she wanted to marry me  
  
when she just passed out.  
  
Jeff: I told her she should have lied down. Hurricane, call an ambulance and Shawn,  
  
help me get her to the couch.  
Layna: She's always wanted to ride in an ambulance. To bad she's unconscious. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
[In the ambulance]  
  
Layna: [Holding camera] *flash*  
  
Jeff: WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!  
  
Layna: Gees overprotective boyfriend? I wanted her to remember her first ride in an  
  
ambulance and since she technically won't remember it, I decided to take pictures. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Doctor Sonar: Robyn just came out of the operating room and she had a mild  
concussion. Worst case scenario she'll be sleeping a lot.  
  
Layna: When can we see her?  
  
[Hospital Room]  
  
Robyn: [Just waking up] White walls? Layna didn't have me committed again did she?  
  
LAYNA! GET ME OUT OF HERE!  
  
Layna: She thinks I had her committed again? Okay she's going to be perfectly fine.  
  
Everyone else: ..................  
  
Robyn: LAYNA!  
  
Layna: [Entering the hospital room] Calm down, you're in the hospital. I didn't have you  
  
committed though I might consider it............... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Epilogue  
  
Well, Doctor Sonar was right. Robyn was out quite a bit with fits of narcolepsy so  
  
Layna, being the good friend she is used the muses to her full advantage...............  
  
Jericho was taped to the wall as a human dart board which Layna spent hours throwing  
flaming spears at.  
  
Though he did nothing, Shawn had to walk Max and Mipsy the vicious poodle.  
  
Hurricane made coffee and ran errands for Adrian.  
  
Jeff spent hours e-mailing Shawn Michaels hate mail (shhh, don't tell anyone)  
  
Guess what happened to Billy? Being the smart boy Billy is, he was rewarded a meal of  
  
olives and stuffed figs. Good job Billy!  
  
AN:// Yes! Finally, success! I'm done. I might not feel like updating until Friday but knowing myself I'll probably have some of the new story up by Thursday. I can't promise anyone a role in that because its already done and ready to be put to print but if you want to be in one of my stories tell me in your review. Yes, I know this story is a little weird but its funny. I can't promise you my next is any better. My friends all say that its weird and I agree but they also say its funny. I promise the start of the new story by Sunday. Why Sunday? Because I say so!  
  
XXXXOOOOO *MWAH* 


End file.
